Unmasking Covert Narcissism: The Quiet/Vulnerable Type of Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Recognizing and Managing a Hidden Egoist: A Step-by-Step Guide
Individuals diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) can exhibit a relentless craving for admiration and an inflated sense of self-importance. However, these traits are not exclusive to individuals with the overt or grandiose type of NPD. There is another subtype called covert, or vulnerable, narcissism, which presents differently.
Covert narcissists exhibit traits such as self-centeredness and manipulative behavior but maintain an introverted demeanor, making it easy to overlook their problematic traits. These individuals can prove challenging to navigate in relationships due to their inability to handle criticism, aggressive reactiveness, and negativity.
Being in close proximity to a covert narcissist can lead to an emotionally taxing experience. They are highly critical of constructive feedback, often withdrawing or giving the cold shoulder as a response. Their reactive and defensive attitude can be draining, exacerbated by their tendency to complain about feeling unappreciated and misunderstood.
Despite their self-absorption and lack of emotional support, covert narcissists are hard to identify because they are more subtle and discreet in their manipulations. Their envy, lack of empathy, and intense desire for admiration may lead them to employ indirect channels, such as passive-aggressive behavior, to vent their frustration.
Like all narcissists, covert narcissists seldom acknowledge their shortcomings or the negative impact of their actions on themselves and others. Narcissistic Personality Disorder is classified as a Cluster B personality disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), falling under the same category as Antisocial, Borderline, and Histrionic Personality Disorders.
The term "covert narcissism" does not appear in the current DSM; however, the concept has been recognized and studied for decades. In 1989, psychiatrist Glen Gabbard referred to this subtype as the "hypervigilant narcissist," and in 1993, psychiatrist James Masterson theorized the existence of "closet narcissists" who differ from "exhibitionistic narcissists." Some researchers suggest that rather than separate categories, narcissists may shift between grandiose and vulnerable (overt and covert) states.
Covert narcissism shares some common traits with overt narcissism, such as self-centeredness, hypersensitivity to criticism, and a desire for validation. However, covert narcissists are more reserved, introverted, and emotionally reactive. In high-pressure social situations, such as job interviews, they may experience larger spikes in stress hormones compared to their extroverted counterparts.
Other traits of covert narcissism include a fragile self-esteem, a victim mentality, passive-aggressiveness, constant manipulation, and negativity, accentuated by a high degree of neuroticism. Insecure attachment style is also common among covert narcissists, while grandiose narcissists may exhibit dismissive views of relationships.
The causes of covert narcissism are believed to be a combination of genetics and childhood experiences. Some studies of twins have suggested that the disorder is at least partially inheritable, with genetic predispositions leading to the development of narcissistic traits. Childhood experiences, such as excessive parental praise or abuse/neglect, may further perpetuate the development of the disorder.
Interacting with a covert narcissist can put a considerable strain on relationships and emotional well-being. Tips for coping with covert narcissism include maintaining a realistic perspective on the relationship, setting boundaries, dealing with passive-aggressiveness, and seeking support elsewhere.
By learning as much as possible about narcissism and other personality disorders, understanding their root causes, and not excusing bad behavior, individuals affected by covert narcissists can better manage their expectations and maintain their emotional balance.
- Emotional support may be hard to find with individuals exhibiting covert narcissism, as they struggle to acknowledge their shortcomings and often react defensively to constructive feedback.
- Emotional intelligence is crucial in understanding and navigating relationships with covert narcissists, who may be more introverted but still display manipulative behavior and an intense desire for admiration.
- In the realm of education-and-self-development, studying narcissistic personality disorder, particularly the covert subtype, can provide valuable insights into personal-growth and better mental-health management for those dealing with these individuals.
- A covert narcissist's self-centeredness, coupled with their high neuroticism, negativity, and passive-aggressive behavior, can have a significant impact on one's health-and-wellness and lifestyle, making it essential to seek support elsewhere and maintain boundaries.
